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I'm broke and alone with no direction in life
And my telephone just never rings.
When I'm home alone with my reflections
Hey! I get no affection from my TV.

My friends always say: Hey! It's time to settle down
And raise a family with two point three kids.
'Cause everywhere I go problems find my way
And everywhere I turn more problems evolve.

A friend got me a number from the classified,
I said, "Hey are you crazy? Are you out of your mind?"
He said, "Trust me because you qualify,
It says right here and it's underlined. . ."

To marry Maria, it's panacea.
She'll cook you tortilla for breakfast
And serve you sangria in a night dress.
It's a good idea, forget all the rest!"

(2x) Oh oh ueoh ueoh ueh oh oh

(In a) nearby pizzeria we set up a date.
I can't wait to see blind date's outcome.
My lack of euphoria may give me away
Because I've been hurt before and that can't be fun.

It's finally the time, I sat by the window.
I 've just memorized the whole menu.
My phobia arises because there's no return
And by anytime she'll walk through the door.

A voice inside says, "Run while you can!"
I said, "Shut up voice! Rock and roll, I'm a man!"
She walks through the door, I get mesmerized
And from what I see, I soon realize...

(REFRAIN) (2x)
(4x)Oh oh ueoh ueoh ueh oh oh


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