(This song is available at Amazon.com and here at the shopping cart)

I'm broke and alone with no direction in life
And my telephone just never rings.
When I'm home alone with my reflections
Hey! I get no affection from my TV.

My friends always say: Hey! It's time to settle down
And raise a family with two point three kids.
'Cause everywhere I go problems find my way
And everywhere I turn more problems evolve.

A friend got me a number from the classified,
I said, "Hey are you crazy? Are you out of your mind?"
He said, "Trust me because you qualify,
It says right here and it's underlined. . ."

(REFRAIN)
To marry Maria, it's panacea.
She'll cook you tortilla for breakfast
And serve you sangria in a night dress.
It's a good idea, forget all the rest!"

(2x) Oh oh ueoh ueoh ueh oh oh

(In a) nearby pizzeria we set up a date.
I can't wait to see blind date's outcome.
My lack of euphoria may give me away
Because I've been hurt before and that can't be fun.

It's finally the time, I sat by the window.
I 've just memorized the whole menu.
My phobia arises because there's no return
And by anytime she'll walk through the door.

A voice inside says, "Run while you can!"
I said, "Shut up voice! Rock and roll, I'm a man!"
She walks through the door, I get mesmerized
And from what I see, I soon realize...

(REFRAIN) (2x)
(4x)Oh oh ueoh ueoh ueh oh oh